Jack - Christmas

[logan_echolls]

(continued from here)

Sitting in the boarding area, Logan looked out one of the large windows, watching as planes took off and landed. In a way leaving London felt wrong- As though he was taking a time out from serving his sentence. Though working for Torchwood often felt the same way. He'd given up so much when he'd left America, convinced that it was for the greater good, and now- Now it seemed as though it had all been for nothing. Just one more fuck up in a long line of fuck ups.

He took solace in the idea that at least with Torchwood he stood more of a chance accomplishing what he'd come here to do, but that didn't really make it easier.

Glancing over at Jack, he hesitated slightly before speaking up. "What happens if there's no answers. No solutions?" he asked quietly.

Comments

[logan_echolls]

"Don't grow one, please," Logan pleaded with a laugh, pulling his gaze away from the sky to look at Jack.

"It is nice out here though. Clear sky, and the stars coming out... It's beautiful," he replied.

[im_torchwood]

"It really is." He paused, and before he could think better of it...he just kept talking.

"I used to live on an island. Tropical. Great beaches. It was...unbelievable. I made friends. Fell in love. Had a family. It's like a whole other life."

[logan_echolls]

"Sounds like a nice life," Logan replied, putting his feet up.

"You must miss it. ...I get that," he added softly.

[im_torchwood]

"It was a long time ago," he said with a slow nod. "Hundreds of years. But...it was..."

He wasn't sure what he could say that wouldn't shatter the moment.

"My husband, there, then...loving him was...epic. Spanning years and continents. Bloodshed. You know. Epic," he explained, eyes resting heavy on Logan's every expression.

[logan_echolls]

Logan recoiled slightly at hearing his own words, tension obvious in his shoulders- Before a flash of anger.

"Fuck you," he said quietly, getting to his feet and heading for the cabin. He didn't know what kind of game Jack was playing with him, but he wasn't about to sit and let it continue.

[im_torchwood]

"Logan...no, wait," he said, bouncing to follow along. "Let me explain."

It was all going to have to come out, he knew. He didn't like it, but in this one small corner of his life, he didn't want to base it on lies.

"Logan, listen please," he added, stepping down so he could follow Logan to the bunk.

[logan_echolls]

"Listen to what?" Logan snapped, that anger that still bubbled beneath the surface rising to the top. He'd gotten so good at fighting it and hiding it, but there it was. That same fire born from hurt and pain was still there after all these years.

"I don't know what game you're playing, Jack, but I'm not okay with it. This isn't okay."

For a moment it looked like he might take a swing at the other man, but those years of careful control kicked in and his fist made contact with the door frame instead.

[im_torchwood]

Jack saw it coming and didn't even flinch. It had been so long since he'd taken one on the chin. He was genuinely surprised when Logan his the wall.

"If I tell you, I don't think you'll believe me...but I'm not playing with you, Logan. I swear I'm not."

[logan_echolls]

"You're full of shit," Logan snapped.

[im_torchwood]

"I'm really not. Look, you've seen so many impossible things at Torchwood. Would it be so hard to believe that you and I are connected?" Jack asked.

[logan_echolls]

"Connected how, Jack? What are you even implying here?" Logan asked, forcing his anger back under control as he held the other man's gaze.

[im_torchwood]

Jack wet his lips, then took a slow breath.

"You don't remember. You may never remember. Once, a long time ago for me, there was this tropical island. And you and I were together. I swore to you once I would always find you. Took forever. But now you're here."

[logan_echolls]

Logan watched him for a long moment, but after a slow breath he seemed calmer as he replied.

"You understand that's a hell of a story you're asking me to swallow, right? True or not, this is- It's something I'd need time to digest, Jack. I mean, are we talking past lives? Parallel universes? Because it wasn't this one, Captain."

[im_torchwood]

"Which is why I haven't said anything. Because to you I'm basically a stranger...but for me, you feel like home."

[logan_echolls]

"Okay, but that wasn't me," Logan replied calmly. "Whoever it was you were with, Jack, even if it was my damn clone, it wasn't me. You get that, right?"

[im_torchwood]

Jack took a very deep breath, looked at Logan with profound sadness in his eyes, then ultimately nodded.

"Yeah, I know," he said quietly, then turned away so he could go back on deck and look at the stars.

This had gone fabulously wrong, but what was done was done.

[logan_echolls]

Logan watched him go, not prepared to deal with what Jack had just dropped on him. It did explain why they were here though, and why Jack acted as though they were old friends.

Logan scrubbed his face with both hands and sat down on the bed, certain he couldn't sleep now, but also not ready to talk to Jack again.

[im_torchwood]

On the deck, Jack slipped into a chair and reclined it back. Laying all the way back, all he could see were stars. They weren't the stars of the island. He'd never found anywhere in the universe where the stars aligned like that. No, here he could see Sirius and Betelgeuse and if he looked very hard he could see the smudge of the Andromeda galaxy.

The waves lapped softly against the boat and he could hear the crash of waves as they licked at the shore. It was a remarkably comforting sound.

And then he couldn't keep his mind clear and he started thinking about Logan. The Logan he had known. The Logan he knew now. This could have gone worse, he imagined. But now they were in the middle of the ocean and there was no walking away from this. Jack had made his life one long exercise in running away. But now, just like on the island, he couldn't leave. He had to deal with the mess he'd made.

[logan_echolls]

Eventually Logan lay down and let sleep take him. Perhaps this would all make more sense tomorrow.

[im_torchwood]

Jack had dozed off for a bit and when he woke the moon was threatening to set. He looked at his watch and then peeked in on Logan. The blanket was askew so he covered him up, then went to the wheel room to take them back to the marina. They had a whole day more and Jack wasn't sure, but he thought maybe they should just go home an part ways.

The thought of losing Logan again made him sick.

[logan_echolls]

Logan woke when he felt them moving, and he emerged from the cabin. He'd pulled a t-shirt on, but was still barefoot as he moved to sit beside Jack again.

At first he seemed as though he might not say anything, but eventually he did speak.

"You should get to know me," he said, his voice low and tired, but calm. "I get that whatever memories you have aren't just going to vanish, but- What you think you want, and what's actually here might not line up. I can't promise you that what happened in this other place with some other me will happen again, but I know I can't sit here and assume it wont either."

Sighing, he leaned back in his seat.

"I wish you'd said something sooner. I get why you didn't, but that's a hell of a bomb to drop in the middle of paradise, Jack."

[im_torchwood]

Jack sighed and his tongue clicked just a little.

:I know," he said. "I know. You're right about all of it. I just thought if we were here and you were him, it might jog your memory. We were there for years. With dogs and a cat and I built you a really nie place and I was...happy. And I promised Id find you. Guess I got all that wrong."

He was quiet for a moment and then finally looked over at Logan. He wanted to say 'I love you' but he was smart enugh to know now wasn't the right time.

[logan_echolls]

"So that's the real reason you hired me, huh?" he asked after a beat. "Because you thought i might be him?"

[im_torchwood]

Jack nodded. "And I thought even if you weren't...I knew you'd be an asset to Torchwood. Just because of who you are."

[logan_echolls]

"I don't know about that, but- I am glad I get to feel like I'm actually doing something," Logan replied.